Sunday, December 13, 2015
Sending Out an Apology
An Asian man with his son made me uncomfortable, but I didn't know he was Asian..
What It Was
I was countering my mom's attacks, shoulda tried harder to ignore.
I don't find this okay..
Ruined/Ruin Relationships
I lost/got ruined 4 major relationships to my life this past few weeks.
Something about this experience was not meant to be. I mess up, they have been watching, it's hard, it's over. I still have my life to lead. I must think more positively. Leaving the room seems better than not, sometimes.
So, I dunno.. People, have fun with other people who supposedly have it easier.
Something about this experience was not meant to be. I mess up, they have been watching, it's hard, it's over. I still have my life to lead. I must think more positively. Leaving the room seems better than not, sometimes.
So, I dunno.. People, have fun with other people who supposedly have it easier.
Problem
They are pretending someone I like is being mean to me but doesn't make sense. They are giving *everything* to Bella Thorne and nothing to me that I earned. This person doing this is just lazy and wants to show off how mean they can be to me.
I was just checking on my post about her.
I was just checking on my post about her.
I've always been the good one.
You all are mean.
I can wake up with a bright/smart attitude to greet the day, and it will always be ruined.
I can wake up with a bright/smart attitude to greet the day, and it will always be ruined.
Problem
My mom is acting like she's pounding her pride at me like I did something. She was being mean like she was all that and I thought she was "nothing" for being so but didn't say it. What can I think. People keep making a force surrounding me where they press my buttons. They won't stop! My dad and mom and others. They are analyzing me for what I did and not my parents and others for being mean to me. I was trying to eat. It sounds like she thinks Ellen DeGeneres said she could act all out, like I've seen others in my life do who are mean to me who I like.
Problem
My mom wants that which I don't want to be as popular as Ellen DeGeneres herself. Impossible, anyway.
Problem
My mom is rubbing in someone with my possible future daughter and separating out Bella Thorne to an idea of paradise. No one can tell me mean things like that and say everything's okay for others-because it has to be okay for everyone.. What's with the highlight of the comparison saying things are cool for me?
Problem
My dad acted like he was someone else saying to m********* all to where my possible future daughter is, and it affected me, like a pouring feeling as he did it. Same with the traffic thing before. It made the words, "K*** such and such," very remotely come to mind and maybe stronger one of those times, not wanting to think it actually. I was upset and I guess it triggered something people do in Orlando, admit something and then deny it, just to get it to not foster and grow. It shouldn't happen, tho. My dad was right there, and I believe it was also him. He must have a great hatred for me. Also, at church, something happened that seemed threatening.
Well, I'm sorry that thought came up, but I didn't want to think that and of course did not mean it.
Well, I'm sorry that thought came up, but I didn't want to think that and of course did not mean it.
Your Issue About Me Concerning Ellen DeGeneres Recently
This post is about you thinking about me being upset recently thinking Ellen DeGeneres did something to me but not because I posted it online.
I just was upset that she really was doing mean things behind my back, as shed light on by my oldest aunt. I didn't mean any harm, just upset at all the mean things that had been done to me by whoever, supposedly people claim probably Ellen DeGeneres. Secret messages that are hard to remember.
Whoever did that, it shouldn't have been done. Don't go telling me I'd mean offense to if someone didn't do something very mean. Whoever did it and if that's what and how it was done. I did think of her in some form a lot because it seemed true. My therapist says she doesn't know/talk to me.
However, since my life is an experiment, it's not stupid for me to say these things. Ellen DeGeneres acts like she does and doesn't at different times, anyway. I guess that's the ultimate escape. She justifies it, too.
So, whoever it is needs to be stopped. How can it be if they said they had me cornered experimenting/spying on me in private? They tell everyone to give and take with me.
There, this post is pretty clean while including what's been thrown at me. I guess you could infer negativity. That's too bad.
I just was upset that she really was doing mean things behind my back, as shed light on by my oldest aunt. I didn't mean any harm, just upset at all the mean things that had been done to me by whoever, supposedly people claim probably Ellen DeGeneres. Secret messages that are hard to remember.
Whoever did that, it shouldn't have been done. Don't go telling me I'd mean offense to if someone didn't do something very mean. Whoever did it and if that's what and how it was done. I did think of her in some form a lot because it seemed true. My therapist says she doesn't know/talk to me.
However, since my life is an experiment, it's not stupid for me to say these things. Ellen DeGeneres acts like she does and doesn't at different times, anyway. I guess that's the ultimate escape. She justifies it, too.
So, whoever it is needs to be stopped. How can it be if they said they had me cornered experimenting/spying on me in private? They tell everyone to give and take with me.
There, this post is pretty clean while including what's been thrown at me. I guess you could infer negativity. That's too bad.
Commercials
It sounds like someone is acting like Ellen DeGeneres told them to relay an insulting secret message. That foot smoothing commercial, sounds like "Ah Ma Pay." They said something about "advanced choir" in relation to others's foot-smoothing.
I saw one that's local, and they think that if something I think is questioned that I'm not good enough for Orlando. They just bring up something that comes up.
I saw one that's local, and they think that if something I think is questioned that I'm not good enough for Orlando. They just bring up something that comes up.
Problem
I was framed this week to lose/"ruin" my 2 favorite relationships here, supposedly cuza my grandma. She likes to test people and then tell us later it was a test and she doesn't do that, just to get people in trouble. She says it was meant to be. My oldest aunt, who she lives with, was here this week.
Problems
Supposedly, Ellen DeGeneres is making it so I can't encounter cool people and have to be stimulated inappropriately by my dad. I don't wanna play around maybe she did it maybe she didn't. I have the right to post about it without feeling threatened.
I came home from church and the grocery store, and I had to stay inside and put my food away rather than help bring it all in cuz my dad kept trying to stimulate me. It was painful in the car.
I came home from church and the grocery store, and I had to stay inside and put my food away rather than help bring it all in cuz my dad kept trying to stimulate me. It was painful in the car.
I got a bone to pick with this.
So, someone is trying to stimulate me inappropriately. It comes in like that. It's not just the people experimenting on me.
How am I supposed to live a good quality life and keep relationships online?
I know they couldn't live like this.
I'm not trying to make a problem, just noticed this.
How am I supposed to live a good quality life and keep relationships online?
I know they couldn't live like this.
I'm not trying to make a problem, just noticed this.
Problem
They keep acting "***" leaving me negative messages all the time.
They are trying to get me and to feel stimulated by them inappropriately/sinfully.
It seems like it always has to happen. I don't have much peace. Just know they do this like it doesn't matter just for me.
They keep pressuring me and want me to admit I'm bad in my thoughts. They are promoting it as good and acting like I'm just some thing and they get to make bases to annoy me. I don't like this. I think this is for my dad or grandma, the way people are strangely nice and then go mean. A lotta people in my generation have this problem.
I don't wanna be picked at being made to feel I am bad all the time, like I'm torn down daily like some statue.
Everyone is under the radar to annoy me.
I already said I disagree, and they keep fighting that. It just pops up out of nowhere.
My point in this post is that I have people out there who have mixed emotions about me.
Like, the *** messages like it's all that to get it out on me for their insecurities I have encountered.
I feel like I'm being whipped for like not being pretty growing up or something.
Their stimulating me inappropriately and acting like it's okay, like, all the time.
Their trying to make me feel like a sinner and hurting me rather than believing me.
Setting me up and pretending about what happened.
Then, for some reason me saying what happened is wrong, like this. Maybe, some of what I said has been pointed to something to be made worse for me. I just keep getting on a role. I noticed the inappropriate stimulation. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone before, but I didn't mean to. Guess I messed up. This doesn't seem right, tho. I didn't do what they did to me. Did you know they believe that if I have a problem with something that even if that thing is wrong it was the cause for my finding a problem with them and try to scare me about it?
You know, something just gave me an idea to write this. I think the little insults are meant to be traps. I talk about it or something and they think I need a bigger problem to get used to. However, there's no time for me to make progress in my life, real work. It's all about rich, snobbish people rattling on about who everyone is until Doomsday comes.
Maybe, I should appreciate what seems like secret messages and then forget about it I guess.
They are trying to get me and to feel stimulated by them inappropriately/sinfully.
It seems like it always has to happen. I don't have much peace. Just know they do this like it doesn't matter just for me.
They keep pressuring me and want me to admit I'm bad in my thoughts. They are promoting it as good and acting like I'm just some thing and they get to make bases to annoy me. I don't like this. I think this is for my dad or grandma, the way people are strangely nice and then go mean. A lotta people in my generation have this problem.
I don't wanna be picked at being made to feel I am bad all the time, like I'm torn down daily like some statue.
Everyone is under the radar to annoy me.
I already said I disagree, and they keep fighting that. It just pops up out of nowhere.
My point in this post is that I have people out there who have mixed emotions about me.
Like, the *** messages like it's all that to get it out on me for their insecurities I have encountered.
I feel like I'm being whipped for like not being pretty growing up or something.
Their stimulating me inappropriately and acting like it's okay, like, all the time.
Their trying to make me feel like a sinner and hurting me rather than believing me.
Setting me up and pretending about what happened.
Then, for some reason me saying what happened is wrong, like this. Maybe, some of what I said has been pointed to something to be made worse for me. I just keep getting on a role. I noticed the inappropriate stimulation. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone before, but I didn't mean to. Guess I messed up. This doesn't seem right, tho. I didn't do what they did to me. Did you know they believe that if I have a problem with something that even if that thing is wrong it was the cause for my finding a problem with them and try to scare me about it?
You know, something just gave me an idea to write this. I think the little insults are meant to be traps. I talk about it or something and they think I need a bigger problem to get used to. However, there's no time for me to make progress in my life, real work. It's all about rich, snobbish people rattling on about who everyone is until Doomsday comes.
Maybe, I should appreciate what seems like secret messages and then forget about it I guess.
Problems
Do you know people who threaten you if you don't do/think what they say? That's pretty camp.
Then, there's when people say you've already succumbed and who harm you thinking that means your submission.
I feel as tho every thing that makes me happy people think I don't deserve. Like, the dance stuff, maybe even drinking water.
I'm not living to fear others who insist I've messed up and it's not okay cuza who I am and, moreso, who I'm not, supposedly. None of this should hit a nerve in anyone. If it does please come out right now. That's dangerous. Sound familiar? That's how I'm treated. I am sick of hearing of this stuff! Can a person fear a threat and find something useless? The Bible says that's wrong, too. I know people secretly disobey that which they proclaim as right, like this. They change the rules when dealing with a mixed race person, someone who can act European, probably, but is not allowed. People are so vicious in wanting to be treated white. They snap back like a snake in the grass! I guess they aren't any better than other people in their desires at least. You have to let people be who they want, and that includes other races. Why am I on psychotic pills and told I am schizo? Seems like most other people have the problem with the way things are and are becoming in the good change. Sometimes, I worry people don't care about others, too. Do you know people who have problems with everything? I also don't like people who think everything others do means "d****." If I can make something of my life, it should not be disposed of, regardless of who exists in the universe. I just know things have not been perfect. I find some of this amusing. I have a problems blog and don't post every problem. It seems, no matter what I do, I will just get trapped and attacked by the ways of the world and nice people who do it to stay popular/with a good reputation. A lot of what I say is right and I still live miserably, like that's okay. It's like they've wanted to say anything could make something seem right or wrong and they made their decision already, reveling in me seeming to be begging them, who for some reason have the ability to alter my life. Some pretty mean stuff happened. Yes, I feel threatened illegally. No one should have to do this. Some of it seems like a tradeoff, but it's still not okay. People never tell me when they have a serious problem, and then I get in trouble anyway.
Some things aren't as bad, but I think people want to be punishing me. I just run into issues in my personal life. Some people are unbearably mean to me and it's hard to encounter some.
Then, there's when people say you've already succumbed and who harm you thinking that means your submission.
I feel as tho every thing that makes me happy people think I don't deserve. Like, the dance stuff, maybe even drinking water.
I'm not living to fear others who insist I've messed up and it's not okay cuza who I am and, moreso, who I'm not, supposedly. None of this should hit a nerve in anyone. If it does please come out right now. That's dangerous. Sound familiar? That's how I'm treated. I am sick of hearing of this stuff! Can a person fear a threat and find something useless? The Bible says that's wrong, too. I know people secretly disobey that which they proclaim as right, like this. They change the rules when dealing with a mixed race person, someone who can act European, probably, but is not allowed. People are so vicious in wanting to be treated white. They snap back like a snake in the grass! I guess they aren't any better than other people in their desires at least. You have to let people be who they want, and that includes other races. Why am I on psychotic pills and told I am schizo? Seems like most other people have the problem with the way things are and are becoming in the good change. Sometimes, I worry people don't care about others, too. Do you know people who have problems with everything? I also don't like people who think everything others do means "d****." If I can make something of my life, it should not be disposed of, regardless of who exists in the universe. I just know things have not been perfect. I find some of this amusing. I have a problems blog and don't post every problem. It seems, no matter what I do, I will just get trapped and attacked by the ways of the world and nice people who do it to stay popular/with a good reputation. A lot of what I say is right and I still live miserably, like that's okay. It's like they've wanted to say anything could make something seem right or wrong and they made their decision already, reveling in me seeming to be begging them, who for some reason have the ability to alter my life. Some pretty mean stuff happened. Yes, I feel threatened illegally. No one should have to do this. Some of it seems like a tradeoff, but it's still not okay. People never tell me when they have a serious problem, and then I get in trouble anyway.
Some things aren't as bad, but I think people want to be punishing me. I just run into issues in my personal life. Some people are unbearably mean to me and it's hard to encounter some.
Apology for Anyone Innocent
I probably went off the edge being upset since my aunt came and she shed light on how people are hating me. Not really, but it can be seen that way.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)